Long Car Ride + Matthew + Tipper = Knitting Jokes?
What did the purl stitch say to the knit stitch?
Nice backside!
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A ball of Lopi with a chip on his shoulder walks into a crowded bar, orders a drink, and sits down. A skein of Cascade 220 passes by and accidentally bumps the Lopi. The Lopi jumps up, hand going for his gun. The bartender steps in:
"Hey, watch it. You may be rough, but he's worsted."
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Why did the cable cross to the right?
Beecause it was a braid.
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What did the ball of yarn say to the skein?
You're twisted!
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A skein of Peace Fleece arrives for an audition. "Now," the director says, "You're up for the role of a purse. You need to BE the purse. Show me what you've got." The Peace Fleece performs its monologue - it was a decent performance, though nothing stellar.
"It's just not working," the director said. "You're just too rough, too unrefined."
The Peace Fleece, heartbroken, exclaimed, "But if you only knew how I felt!"
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What did the knitter say when she lost her yarn?
Where's my yarn?
(a homage to one of my favorite jokes of all time)
And now for something completely different.
Drunken knitting!
This is the product of some Malabrigo laceweight, mechanical pencils (size 11?), an impromptu garter stitch shawl pattern in my head, two glasses of chardonnay, and one rolicking car ride. I tried picking it up again after three or four (I lost track) vodka tonics and a Jaegerbomb. That did not go so well.
This ain't your grandma's hobby!
Tipper @ 12:12 AM * link
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